Stephani* needed to tell me what gripped her mind. She refused to communicate with others and looked like a scared refugee when she sat in class with the other girls. Lord, what caused these emotional issues? I probed and finally turned to Colossians 2:15 in my Bible and read to her how Jesus triumphed over Satan and disarmed all demonic powers and authorities at His crucifixion and resurrection.
“He stripped them of their power to hold people captive against their will.” Then I had her read it and tell me what it meant. She responded that she had victory through Jesus. Those were the words I wanted to hear, and it secured another step in the process of setting her free from fear. We prayed more, and the power of the words she read began working inside of her. Stephani* then took authority over the enemy’s messing with her mind.
With more coaxing, she confessed, “Mama Carroll, I don’t want you or anybody to hate me. I’m a bad person, and I don’t know how anybody can forgive me for all the awful things I’ve done.”
I could see her confession included herself. So many times I’ve been able to forgive others but couldn’t bring myself into the equation. That horrible feeling consumed me, and yet the Lord included me in the line of forgiveness. Lord, please open Stephani’s eyes so that she can see that love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8).
Mary Magdalene came to mind, so back to the Bible we went. I shared how the love of the Lord changed this prostitute’s life, because Jesus forgave her. I explained that Mary had been forced into her lifestyle. “She sold herself out of choice because of tough situations, but she came to the Lord for forgiveness through His unconditional love. They became close friends, and she served with Him and His followers. He forgives you, and so do all of us. We all have areas of shame in our pasts, but we are no longer bound to them.”
“You feel a fear of what others think, but that is a deception of the enemy. You are surrounded by people who love you for who you are: a beautiful, kind, and gracious young lady. What happened in the past is nailed to the cross of Jesus, and you can leave it in the past.”
Stephani lifted her head with a determined look on her face. That look stirred hope in me that she understood freedom awaited her. We continued to pray for her healing and acceptance of forgiveness.
We face times when we are unable to forgive ourselves, but reaching that level needs to be obtained to be fully healed. Forgiveness is the key to healing: the door needs to open and the garbage cleaned out. Later that evening I saw breakthrough as Stephani talked and laughed with some of the other girls. She experienced a new joy in her life by being set free from fear.
*Name has been changed.
I knew some of the pain Stephani felt because she lived with me. She didn’t know I had been seeking the Lord for ways I could help her. The time had come for serious sessions of counsel. Finding the cause isn’t the tricky part. It’s untangling all of the thoughts and feelings, besides working through the pain to see healing. I only had a few counseling courses, and would be considered an amateur, but I knew the Lord could heal her despite what I lacked. He would be my guide, and His promise to give me wisdom when I needed it brought me comfort.