Category Archives: Shadow of His Wings

The orphanage in Monjas, Jalapa, Guatemala

Dedication of the Property

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GirlssingingdedicationI shook my head in amazement as I looked at the people who kept pouring through the front gate of our new home, James Project of Latin America in Monjas, Jalapa (Guatemala). Many of these people had walked the mile from town to the orphanage, if they couldn’t find room in the back of somebody’s pickup.

I didn’t realize that this day, dedication to the Lord day, would impact me like it did. Joanne and I had started the orphanage three years before in San Cristobal. We found this property where we could expand and where the children could experience freedoms that they couldn’t have in the City. James 1:27 and Psalm 68:5 became the mandate given to us. You are the Father of the fatherless for these children and those to come. Oh, Lord, help me to know what that means in real life. They need to understand it in their hearts. The immensity of what it meant to have an orphanage and a school struck me as I looked over the ten acres.

Joanne and I desired that the girls have the opportunity for ministry and service in the community. These Dedicationopeninglearning experiences would prepare them to reach out to others, just as people did for them. So we invited the community to come and get acquainted with all of us, the girls, and included several slots in the program for the girls to perform on stage. Would they receive us as friends?

Bob and Sharon Parks from Isaiah 62:4 Ministries; Pastor Peter Gilliland from Wasilla, Alaska; and Pastor Ralph Diaz from New York ministered to our group during the dedication. What a blessing to have other stateside guests to celebrate with us.

We had planned the details for this evening many weeks before. Some of the simplest ideas ended up taking hours to accomplish. With the closest bakery hours away, we had to find someone who could bake cakes for a few hundred people. We stepped out, sought people for advice, and the plans came together. The evening came, and the show began. However, surprises awaited all of us during the dedication of the property, despite our great preparation for it.

People filled the chairs under the donated tent designed for two-hundred people. It became obvious that the numbers coming in well surpassed the neatly placed chairs. With a need for more seating, chairs were placed on the porch of the duplex, and from there chairs went anywhere there happened to be space. We talked about doing things Guatemalan style, which is cramming many into small spaces. We did it up good that night.

Where did all of these people come from? Could we accommodate everyone with the threat of rain? We later discovered that when a pastor receives an invitation to an event, he passes that invitation on to his congregation. A family will pass the invitation on to their aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, and neighbors. Since we were new people in the community, and gringos besides, many people wanted to see us and the orphanage. We then understood the reason for the multitudes and felt pleased that they all came.

The moment arrived. The local gospel band struck their cords as our youngest, spunky Celin, led the girls onto the make-shift stage, just as the heavens opened. Oh no, would they be able to continue with the praise and worship? Some of the band had to stand partially under the canvas and partially in the downpour. Lord, do we need to cancel everything and wait for a drier day? I looked at the angry gray clouds and knew the rain wouldn’t end soon. What could we do now?

Return a Girl to the Court

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I looked at the great team of people we had at the orphanage and the many hours they committed to working with the children. My mind reviewed the resources we had available to us as we encountered and dealt with each child’s individual issues. All of this felt good until it came time to return a girl to the court because we couldn’t reach her.

Gabriela* lived a difficult life before coming to the orphanage. Her grandparents participated in witchcraft and beat and abused her with knives, machetes, belt buckles, and whatever else lay close by. The stepfather sexually abused this twelve-year-old. Another piece of my heart ripped out when I heard that her mother committed suicide. In her desperation, Gabriela ran away from home to find her biological father. She did not have his full name and had only the zone number in Guatemala City where he might be living. The police picked her up off of the street and took her to the children’s court. Her bold actions told us a lot about this girl and the strength of her survival instincts. Lord, show us what we can do to bring love and peace into her heart and to guide her in the right direction.

This pretty, round-faced, dark-eyed imp started acting out immediately when she entered the orphanage. We didn’t see the usual “honeymoon” period. When the house-mother heard a ruckus in the bedroom and investigated, she found that Gabriela had gone berserk. She cut up her shoes and aggressively ripped her clothes right in front of the house-mother. Joanne dealt strongly with her, but a few days later, Gabriela took a sharp kitchen knife and chopped at the end of a wooden table. The “tia” (aunt) in charge of the children couldn’t get her to stop.

“Mama Carroll, I need your help quickly!”

I jumped up from my desk and saw Gabriela butchering the table with a paring knife. “Gabriela, please come here,” I asked in a calm but firm voice. Oh, Lord, help me to distract her from what she is doing and get the knife from her. She ignored my command, so I moved toward her and grabbed her arm. After removing the knife from her hand, I guided her to the office.

“What you did puts you and others in danger. You are never to put your hands on a knife. Do you understand?” My loud voice covered up the shaking I felt on the inside. “Answer me, Gabriela!”

Eyes can tell us a lot about what is going on in a person. The blank dark eyes that looked at me revealed a lost child who had huge walls around her heart. Her survival tactics consisted of anger and violence, which appeared to be a warning that nobody would break through those walls. Would we need to return this girl to the court because we lacked the ability to minister to the needs inside of her? The next few months would give me the answer.

*Name has been changed.

Changes and Adaptations: Part 2

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I continued to pray for the ones who felt they had lost something when we moved and that the Lord would help them with the changes and adaptations to this rural community. Life in Monjas presented something completely different from their life in San Cristobal. My concerns increased when I had a visit with Tito,* the guy who didn’t want to leave the City. “Mama Carroll, I am here in Monjas, but next weekend I am going back to the City,” he firmly stated, referring to a weekend trip.

I cautiously responded, “When girls come to us, we have a rule that they can’t have any family visits for the first six weeks. Time is provided to make an adjustment without negative distractions or to have a pull back to their old life. They stay focused on settling in with the Shadow family.” I hoped my smile would soften my words.

“Oh no!” he declared, as he slapped his forehead with his hand. Uncertainty gripped me because I didn’t know how he had taken my comments. Did he hear my point and understand it had validity, even though I didn’t have the authority to tell him he couldn’t return for a visit? Then he gave me a hug, and we laughed.

It took me by surprise when the subject came up a couple of months later. Tito* announced to me, “I never thought I would ever be saying this to you, but I don’t want to go back to the City to live. I love Monjas! My children can play outside and safely ride bikes in the street without supervision.” I think my heart did a jig. Thank you, Lord, for working peace in the hearts of people and helping them find the path you have for them.

While the kids were playing, I noticed that Nely* kept giving me timid looks. I learned that usually meant something needed to be said, and the child didn’t know how to get my attention. “Hi Nely, how are you today?” Her smile warmed my heart because this child cried all the way to Monjas on moving day.

“I’m good, and I want to share something with you.” She ducked her head, shuffled her feet, but straightened up and looked me in the eyes. “I know I didn’t want to move to this place, but I confess that I like it here. I’m sorry for the way I acted. You were right, it is a better life here.”

Yahoo! “That’s great to hear Nely, can you tell me what helped to change your mind?”

IMG_3313“We do have more freedom to be out of the orphanage, and we can do more things here without being afraid that someone will hurt us. I love going to the swimming pool and watching my sisters ride bikes.”

Nelly saw the advantages of this place and admitted that she no longer wanted to return to Guatemala City. She had made a major adjustment in the transplant and enjoyed her new home, as did all the other girls and workers.

When I saw the positive responses in the lives around me, I felt that frosting had been added to my “cake.” God led us on the path He had for our lives, and what unfolded before us met more than our expectations. This wasn’t a “happily ever after” time without any difficulties. Life is full of changes and adaptation, but the Lord will guide us through those difficult times with His love and wisdom just as He did during this time.

*Name has been changed.

Changes and Adaptations

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I watched the girls settle into their new environment, as we faced many changes and adaptation in all of our lives. As an orphanage, the kids needed to be monitored, and freedom didn’t mean they could come and go as they pleased. Schedules, rules, and activities needed to be changed from what we had before. Joanne and I felt like we rode a daily merry-go-round to keep up with issues that needed to be taken care of “right now.”

The nearest supermarket was three hours away, so providing for this hungry family required a twenty-minute drive to the next town over. The small grocery store had many of the basics, even though it looked like a “mom and pop” store with five aisles. It sure beat shopping at the tiendas in Monjas, where one went to a counter and bought items Little House on the Prairie style. The street-market vendors met the need for fruit and vegetables.

With the starting of our private school, I needed to find places close by for purchasing underwear, shoes, and socks. These don’t exist in a tienda. Surprisingly, I found shoes for women available in several places in Monjas. Finding shoes wasn’t the problem, but each place carried only one or two of the same size in the same style. That meant going to every place possible, including the nearby towns, to get school and tennis shoes for everyone.

100_8066The girls wore uniforms to school, and we found a seamstress who made them for minimal the cost. The only pattern she used needed to be adjusted according to each girl’s measurement. I needed to bring all twenty-one to her for that accomplishment amazed at how she used her eyes and measurements for a completed uniform. Finding the material took longer, but we found a green plaid that would be the signature pattern for Christian Liberty School. I breathed a deep sigh of relief after all of the completed details. I knew the next school years had just been mapped out for the uniforms.

Yes, there were many areas of change and adaptation. Many times I felt like a wheel inventor. I longed for a manual that gave point-by-point how-to instructions. I’m sure the Lord heard me say at least ten times a day, “Please give me wisdom.” I faced the fact that my life would be like this for a long time, with continual decision-making, because we continued to grow as a Project. I cried out to the Lord that I didn’t have the ability to do what my position required. Then I would remember what the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 12:9: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (NIV). I could trust the Lord to give me what I needed. Didn’t He call me to do this? His promises filled my mind and heart. I looked back over the testimonies of starting the orphanage, the miracle of purchasing the land, and now residing in a place I dearly loved. The changes made for a better life for these children, and God was helping us adapt by giving us all we needed in the process.